I have been teasing my husband for weeks about his initial reaction upon hearing the news that the twin babies we are expecting are both girls. However I have a confession to make. My own first thoughts upon hearing this revelation weren't all joyous. But let me tell Alan's story first:
He had sworn up and down that we were having 2 boys. He was just so sure of it. His mother and I both thought that it was one of each, but Alan was completely convinced that he had produced 2 little men. So much so that I even started to feel a little bit sad at one point thinking that I might not be carrying a girl. About 2 days before that fateful 13 week ultrasound, his father came out and declared that he believed that we were having 2 girls. 2 Girls?!?!? That never even crossed our minds. My father-in-law, however, has quite a reputation for his accurate predictions when it comes to family members and the sex of their babies. Still, I thought for sure he was off on this one.
So, when I took my mother-in-law to the ultrasound, we were both stunned and amused when the technician told us that it was indeed 2 girls. We were both quite giggly when we left the hospital where the ultrasound was performed and drove directly to my husband's work. When I said to him, "Guess what we're having?" He of course replied enthusiastically, never doubting himself, "2 boys!"
"Wrong...2 girls," I said.
I swear all the color drained from his face, and he just slouched back in his seat. Eyes cast downward, he mumbled something that sounded like, "Girls? What am I going to do with girls?" To make matters worse, this just meant that his father was right again. Nothing that any one of us wanted to admit!
His defense then became that the 13 week ultrasound was too early to accurately determine the sex of each baby. He had plenty of people to support this argument. At that point, he decided that the sonographer had really only taken a "guess" and therefore we still did not actually know the sexes of our babies. Anytime he caught me referring to them as "the girls" or telling people we were having twin girls, he always corrected me, saying, "We don't know that yet. The verdict is still out."
Finally, the 20 week anatomy ultrasound came up, and fortunately he was able to take off work to come and see for himself. My parents came, too. We had a different sonographer for this ultrasound, but once again she looked at each baby one at a time, and declared each of them a girl. A-ha!! My husband heard it with his own ears this time, and even saw it with his own eyes. Sorry! No penises! He could deny it no longer!
Now, in defense of my husband, I have never for a moment doubted that he will make an outstanding father. He currently has 3 nieces and 3 nephews (including the ones that he has inherited through our marriage) and they all love him. I would even go so far as to say especially the girls. And he would like me to make it very clear that he is ecstatic about having 2 daughters. He doesn't want them to ever read this post and be crushed by the idea that their daddy, who they no doubt will by then be absolutely head over heels in love with and adore more than any other (including me!), really wanted sons the whole time we were expecting them.
I personally think our girls will be confident enough to be able to laugh at the idea of their dad being stressed about their impending arrival. I think they will be so well loved that they will have no question as to whether Alan is indeed fulfilled by the children that he was blessed with. I just like to take whatever moments I can to poke fun at my dear husband, and since he does the same to me, I have no doubt that our daughters will enjoy the chop busting as well. Life has enough tragedies. We all need to laugh at ourselves, right?
Now, as for my confession, although my mum-in-law and I were giggling about the announcement on our way to see Alan at work, as I've already mentioned, the truth is that some other thoughts were running side by side with the giddiness.
Thoughts like memories of my own teenage years. Recollections of skipping school, sneaking out of my parents' house in the middle of the night, smoking cigarettes, and drinking beer. And, of course, memories of boys....lots of boys, and all kinds of boys, but mostly bad boys. Long hair and no thoughts or plans for the future. Oh my goodness!! TIMES TWO??
(Just as a side note, in case you're wondering... I turned out okay! I mean, I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, and I still haven't completed my college degree, but I am still determined to do both! And I never wound up in jail, or rehab, or in a loveless marriage with someone who did wind up in one of these two places. Although I can't speak for any of those aforementioned bad boys from my youth. I thankfully lost touch with all of them! In fact, I did end up with a true English gentleman, who, although he did have his share of "fun" growing up, still ended up a nice, polite man who loves family - mine and his both - and is a real rule follower. He actually believes that it is better to ask permission than to beg for forgiveness, if you can believe that!!!)
Then I started picturing Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. Sure, they're rich and famous, but, boy are they a mess. Is this what my future held?
My heart was starting to palpitate. TWO GIRLS?!?! What had I gotten myself into?
Of course, some time has passed since that initial bulletin. I am now entering into my 24th week of pregnancy. I've had some time to get used to the idea of having 2 daughters right off the bat. Somehow, I've convinced myself the old adage is true about two "square" parents producing a "circle" child, and two "circles" producing a "square". My parents were and are definitely two squares, and my husband and I definitely are NOT. So perhaps there is hope for us that our girls will be old-fashioned, conventional, conservative, and, well, square, even through their teenage years. It's possible, right?
I refuse to think about the time at St. Augustine's Grammar School when my religion teacher, Mrs. Scanlon, told us the story about the trouble she had given her parents while growing up. Her mother used to shake her finger at her and say, "God help you. You're going to have one just like you!!"
Years later, when her oldest daughter was giving her a hard time, she used to shake her finger at her and say, "God help you. You're going to have 10 just like you!!"
My mother never cursed me like that (although God knows I remember a million times when she should have!), but I can't help but wonder if God is looking down on me and laughing, thinking, "Your turn is a-comin'!"
He had sworn up and down that we were having 2 boys. He was just so sure of it. His mother and I both thought that it was one of each, but Alan was completely convinced that he had produced 2 little men. So much so that I even started to feel a little bit sad at one point thinking that I might not be carrying a girl. About 2 days before that fateful 13 week ultrasound, his father came out and declared that he believed that we were having 2 girls. 2 Girls?!?!? That never even crossed our minds. My father-in-law, however, has quite a reputation for his accurate predictions when it comes to family members and the sex of their babies. Still, I thought for sure he was off on this one.
So, when I took my mother-in-law to the ultrasound, we were both stunned and amused when the technician told us that it was indeed 2 girls. We were both quite giggly when we left the hospital where the ultrasound was performed and drove directly to my husband's work. When I said to him, "Guess what we're having?" He of course replied enthusiastically, never doubting himself, "2 boys!"
"Wrong...2 girls," I said.
I swear all the color drained from his face, and he just slouched back in his seat. Eyes cast downward, he mumbled something that sounded like, "Girls? What am I going to do with girls?" To make matters worse, this just meant that his father was right again. Nothing that any one of us wanted to admit!
His defense then became that the 13 week ultrasound was too early to accurately determine the sex of each baby. He had plenty of people to support this argument. At that point, he decided that the sonographer had really only taken a "guess" and therefore we still did not actually know the sexes of our babies. Anytime he caught me referring to them as "the girls" or telling people we were having twin girls, he always corrected me, saying, "We don't know that yet. The verdict is still out."
Finally, the 20 week anatomy ultrasound came up, and fortunately he was able to take off work to come and see for himself. My parents came, too. We had a different sonographer for this ultrasound, but once again she looked at each baby one at a time, and declared each of them a girl. A-ha!! My husband heard it with his own ears this time, and even saw it with his own eyes. Sorry! No penises! He could deny it no longer!
Now, in defense of my husband, I have never for a moment doubted that he will make an outstanding father. He currently has 3 nieces and 3 nephews (including the ones that he has inherited through our marriage) and they all love him. I would even go so far as to say especially the girls. And he would like me to make it very clear that he is ecstatic about having 2 daughters. He doesn't want them to ever read this post and be crushed by the idea that their daddy, who they no doubt will by then be absolutely head over heels in love with and adore more than any other (including me!), really wanted sons the whole time we were expecting them.
I personally think our girls will be confident enough to be able to laugh at the idea of their dad being stressed about their impending arrival. I think they will be so well loved that they will have no question as to whether Alan is indeed fulfilled by the children that he was blessed with. I just like to take whatever moments I can to poke fun at my dear husband, and since he does the same to me, I have no doubt that our daughters will enjoy the chop busting as well. Life has enough tragedies. We all need to laugh at ourselves, right?
Now, as for my confession, although my mum-in-law and I were giggling about the announcement on our way to see Alan at work, as I've already mentioned, the truth is that some other thoughts were running side by side with the giddiness.
Thoughts like memories of my own teenage years. Recollections of skipping school, sneaking out of my parents' house in the middle of the night, smoking cigarettes, and drinking beer. And, of course, memories of boys....lots of boys, and all kinds of boys, but mostly bad boys. Long hair and no thoughts or plans for the future. Oh my goodness!! TIMES TWO??
(Just as a side note, in case you're wondering... I turned out okay! I mean, I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up, and I still haven't completed my college degree, but I am still determined to do both! And I never wound up in jail, or rehab, or in a loveless marriage with someone who did wind up in one of these two places. Although I can't speak for any of those aforementioned bad boys from my youth. I thankfully lost touch with all of them! In fact, I did end up with a true English gentleman, who, although he did have his share of "fun" growing up, still ended up a nice, polite man who loves family - mine and his both - and is a real rule follower. He actually believes that it is better to ask permission than to beg for forgiveness, if you can believe that!!!)
Then I started picturing Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. Sure, they're rich and famous, but, boy are they a mess. Is this what my future held?
My heart was starting to palpitate. TWO GIRLS?!?! What had I gotten myself into?
Of course, some time has passed since that initial bulletin. I am now entering into my 24th week of pregnancy. I've had some time to get used to the idea of having 2 daughters right off the bat. Somehow, I've convinced myself the old adage is true about two "square" parents producing a "circle" child, and two "circles" producing a "square". My parents were and are definitely two squares, and my husband and I definitely are NOT. So perhaps there is hope for us that our girls will be old-fashioned, conventional, conservative, and, well, square, even through their teenage years. It's possible, right?
I refuse to think about the time at St. Augustine's Grammar School when my religion teacher, Mrs. Scanlon, told us the story about the trouble she had given her parents while growing up. Her mother used to shake her finger at her and say, "God help you. You're going to have one just like you!!"
Years later, when her oldest daughter was giving her a hard time, she used to shake her finger at her and say, "God help you. You're going to have 10 just like you!!"
My mother never cursed me like that (although God knows I remember a million times when she should have!), but I can't help but wonder if God is looking down on me and laughing, thinking, "Your turn is a-comin'!"
